HOW TO LAY CHIPPY EGGS!

I know how much you all love chippy finish furniture and decorative accessories, so I thought you you might enjoy my tutorial for laying chippy eggs.  But, before I do that, I’m going to let you in on a little secret – I really don’t like chippy stuff in my home.  There….. I said it.  You see, I delight in looking at all the pictures of lovely chippy furniture, chippy home accessories and artfully photographed chippy vignettes.  But, I just don’t want it in my home.  Why?  Well, when you move, bump into or handle authentic chippy objects, chips flake off and fall onto the floor, and that would bug the heck out of me.  I would be destined to traipsing around the house with my vacuum in tow all day long.  I don’t do crumby either.  Crumbs are not allowed to linger on my counters for more than a few seconds before I absolutely must clean them up.  Immediately afterward, I drag my hand across the entire countertop to make sure that I didn’t miss a crumb.  I periodically vacuum out my toaster, too.  Really! I kid you not.

©Linda Nelson 2016

Anyway, I sure hope this instructional satisfies the chippy egg layer in you.  Please note that this exercise is for the experimentally inclined.  Or, let’s put it this way – it’s not a paint by number approach; results will, indeed, vary.

Grab your materials –

• a Styrofoam or wooden egg
• Plaster of Paris
• white gesso
• powdered tempera pigment (ground up colored chalk is a good substitute)
• acrylic craft paints
• paint brush
• small paint sponge
• skewer or metal screw eye

Begin by inserting a skewer into the rounded end of the styrofoam egg; use a screw eye and wire hanging loop if you have a wooden egg.  This step is for making your egg easier to handle during the painting process.  Apply a base coat of gesso to your egg, then let it dry.

©Linda Nelson 2016

• The paint mixing ratios are per one egg, and are rough measurements not to be taken so literally.  It’s simply a guideline to assist you in using close to exact needed amounts.  I do not have every color under the sun of pigment powder; I just have the basics(red, yellow, blue, black and white), and custom mix my own hues.  Also, DO NOT rinse the leftover Plaster of Paris down the drain.  Instead, wipe brushes and paint mixing bowls out with paper towels to remove as much residual solid matter as possible before washing your tools.

Now, for the experimental, messy and fun part –

Mix together 1/2 teaspoon gesso, 1/4 teaspoon of powdered pigment and 1/4 teaspoon of Plaster of Paris to make a pasty consistency, and slather it onto your egg.  When the paint becomes sticky to the touch, cup the egg in your hands and use a “squeeze and release” action to suction lift off various patches of paint from the egg’s surface.  If done correctly, you should now have messy hands and a sloppy looking egg.

©Linda Nelson 2016

Set your egg aside to dry, then repeat this step with a different paint color, only this time, mix a one half batch of paste and apply to select areas of your egg.  Follow up with the “squeeze and release” action, then set aside to dry.

With your sponge, lightly dab some white gesso onto the surface of the egg to create a whitewash effect.  Put a tiny drop of acrylic craft paint onto your fingertip and gently dab irregular shaped splotches on random areas of the egg.  Mix another one half batch of gesso/pigment/Plaster of Paris, and slather it onto various spots on your egg.  Follow up with the “squeeze and release” step.  Observe your egg to determine if you are satisfied with the look, or whether you’d like to create more paint layers.  At this point, you can decide which painting step you’d like to repeat – the thick slather, gesso whitewash, or random dabs of patchy color.

Here are some chippy eggs that I laid.  I’ll probably lay a few more because they’re so much fun to make.

©Linda Nelson 2016

©Linda Nelson 2016

©Linda Nelson 2016

For this egg, I finished it off with a rubdown using a dab of FolkArt “Espresso” antiquing medium.

©Linda Nelson 2016

©Linda Nelson 2016

Happy chippy egg laying, my friends!